Saturday, June 11, 2011

A Birth Story

This is a lovely birth story that I'm passing on to encourage pregnant moms. 

"I awoke just before 4am on the day I turned 41 weeks pregnant. I actually woke up because I found that I had almost subconsciously rolled myself out of bed and onto all fours to handle the pain in my abdomen. I had been semi-waking periodically for what seemed like a couple of hours feeling mild pains, but since I had been having mild contractions for weeks it didn't register any importance.
This time, finding myself on the floor, I took notice. After a few more contractions over the next few minutes, pacing around the apartment, I decided I ought to call my midwife. When I spoke to her I told her that I was a bit confused because the contractions were about two minutes apart but only 20-40 seconds long and I couldn't remember what that meant. We agreed that I was in labor and she said I should get ready and come to the birth center (a 45 minute drive past the Texas border - there are no midwives or birth centers in northern Louisiana) and the trainee midwife, her assistant who I knew from prenatal appointments, would meet us there. I woke up my husband and my sister and tried to get myself dressed and reassure Cara, who was a bit excited and unsure about it all. The contractions were coming harder and more frequently with each minute and I was surprised by how fast everything seemed to be moving. I could hear my sister packing up food in the kitchen and I yelled to her that I didn't think we were going to be there very long so we wouldn't need much food.

After the classic 'there's no gas in the car honey, I'll go fill it up' from Orion (how many books tell you to make sure the tank is full when you're expecting to go into labor??!) while I got myself totally wound up over the fact that I could not find the comfy maternity pants that I had really wanted to wear (after the birth I discovered I had packed them in my birth center bag weeks earlier, lol!), finally we were in the car and driving. I had contractions all the way, gradually getting more intense. About halfway through the journey I found I had to make low moaning sounds through them to handle the pain, but I was surprised and pleased to find that contracting in the car was not nearly as bad as I had expected it to be. As we neared the birth center I told Orion that I felt like I would be transitioning soon after arrival.

When we arrived Orion asked if I needed help getting out of the car. 'Oh no, I'm fine' I breezed, when suddenly a contraction hit as I was climbing out and I discovered that contractions IN the car were actually much nicer than contractions OUT of the car! Once it passed I hobbled inside, greeting Jen, the trainee midwife, on the way in with 'I don't think this is going to take long'. I felt very much 'in business', like there was work to be done on a schedule and I needed to keep up. I went straight to the bathroom, remembering the stressful time I had had emptying my bladder during transition at Cara's birth, I wanted to get that out of the way asap. Jen asked if I wanted her to take my vital signs and I said 'if you don't need to, let's not bother'. I just wanted to get on with it. I asked if I could get in the hot tub at that point and Jen said that was fine so I hopped in and told Orion to go get his swim shorts on so he could come in too. Cara was being cared for by my sister Claire, exploring the birth center at that point I think, although they spent most of the time in the room with me.

Jen listened to the baby's heart at one point and she had to turn off the jets to hear properly. That's when I realised how important the jets were to mitigating the pain - I asked her to put them back on as soon as she was done! Through the contractions I felt very powerful and connected to the baby, talking to him out loud. I felt a kind of euphoria even through the pain. As I've heard many women say, pain isn't even really the right word. It was an intense feeling, with pain mixed in, but there was much more to it and it wasn't really negative. Orion was awesome, pressing on my back through each contraction as he had done during Cara's birth, responding to my instructions on where and how much pressure.

I was right about the speed. After a contraction that turned into grunting, Jen said 'that sounded different, how did that feel?' and I told her my body wanted to push. She just said ' go right ahead, your body knows what to do'. She was sitting a little distance from me in the room and I really appreciated her calm manner and her letting me get on with it. We had previously discussed how I wanted the opportunity to do it mostly unassisted. I realised around this time that the midwife, Charlotte, was obviously not going to be present for the birth although I didn't really want to consider what that would mean so I didn't ask and Jen didn't tell. She seemed to be handling everything very well so I wasn't worried.

I got rather loud during the pushing and at one point I could hear Cara getting a bit upset. In between two pushes I reassured her that I was ok, I just had some work to do and then the baby would be here. I was impressed with myself that I could do that. I felt so powerful the whole time. It was wonderful. I responded to my body, I did what it asked me to do and I let it and the baby do the rest, and it worked amazingly. The 'ring of fire' as the baby's head emerged was so much less intense being in the water than it had been with Cara's birth on dry land, not fiery at all. Jen was by my side at this point and told me that the head was out. I already knew this, I could tell. It felt so interesting to know that I had pushed out the head and could just pause to wait for another contraction and feel so peaceful and in control. (Apparently Orion had seen the head emerging, totally shocked by it not realising we were at that point already, and beckoned Jen over in an alarmed manner. I knew exactly what was happening with the birth the whole time and it was strange to me to realise later that no one else did, probably because I was relatively calm about the whole thing.) When I reached down to feel the head I was pleasantly surprised that it was smooth and not rippled like Cara's had felt. I later discovered that's because he was born with the sac intact so I wasn't feeling his actual scalp. I can't remember how many pushes I did but it was all over very quickly.

Jen caught him and gave him to me. It was 6:15am. He seemed to be asleep and wasn't yet breathing (perhaps he hadn't realised he'd been born, seeing as he was in the sac the whole time). Jen was saying 'come on little one, wake up, it's time to start breathing'. We all talked to him and I was blowing on him gently but nothing happened. I started to feel the slighest rise of panic, wondering what we would do if he didn't start breathing soon and Orion blew on him much more forcefully than me, which did the trick. He woke up with the loudest ear-splitting cry I've ever heard.

Cara got upset at the loud noise coming from the baby so I suggested she come in the tub too. Fortunately I didn't notice that Orion was grossed out by this idea, seeing all the blood and "skin" in the water (it was the sac actually), but he graciously undressed and held her anyway, trying to keep her limbs out of the water. Jen asked if I felt like the placenta was detatched. I said I had felt a mild contraction so she gave the cord a gentle pull and it came right out. I was feeling great so we got out of the tub and I got in the bed with James and Cara and we had our first tandem nursing experience which was relatively successful.

At some point while we were in the bed Charlotte arrived. It turns out she hadn't realised I would go so fast. (She also lives 45 minutes away). I think it was totally meant to be. Jen's presence was perfect for me in that birth and I'm sure for her it was a valuable confidence-boosting experience. They did the newborn check (7 lbs 8oz) and filled out paperwork and I ate a burrito that Orion had thoughtfully asked Claire to put in the toaster oven when we arrived and was now ready in perfect timing. I hadn't torn or haemorraged like I did with my first birth, so I was happy about that. The midwives were required by law to observe me for two hours after birth but I was feeling great and ready to get moving, lol. They offered to run me a herbal bath but I just didn't feel like it and James and I both looked remarkably clean (a great advantage to being born with the sac intact!) When we finally left, both babies blessed us by sleeping the whole way home. :-)

Lessons learned:
1. My decision to be in control gave me the birth that I wanted. I trusted my body to do what it needed and I knew what to expect from my first birth, so I knew I could and should retain full control of the labor and birthing process this time.
2. Waterbirth is fantastic and jets in a hot tub ease pain wonderfully.
3. Second birth really does go fast! (The whole thing was about two and a half hours).
4. Laboring in the car, provided #1 above is in place, does not have to be all that bad.
5. Having Cara witness the birth was a great decision, even at age 16 mths. I feel like it gave her a strong connection to James. She was also able to amuse us for days afterwards imitating my laboring grunts. ;-)
6. Birth can be great! I truly enjoyed this birth and I'm looking forward to doing it again."
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